DEPRESSED CLOWN

This Is A Comedy Blog Written By Paul Frank.
Updated every day with things I think up.
Check out my column or e-mail me.

Oct 31, 2009

Last-Minute Halloween Ideas

  • Your Dad
  • Pleasant, Affable Hitler
  • Michelle Obama’s Dick

Oct 30, 2009

Right now, I have a Seinfeld DVD in, mostly ignoring it because I’m listening to my iPod while surfing the web. Somewhere in a third world country, a child is shaking his fist.

Oct 30, 2009
"Whenever a crowd is booing me, I just imagine they’re all celebrating Halloween and pretending they are ghosts. It holds me over until Tuesday and therapy rolls around."
Oct 28, 2009

I’m Thinking About Starting A New Facebook Group Called “If You Hate The New Facebook, I Hate You”

Because seriously, you still go to Facebook because it’s constantly changing for the better. You will get used to the “changes” and eventually will not be able to live without them. Plus, the old news feed is still there, there’s just now a live feed so you never get bored, you douchebag. I hate you.

Oct 26, 2009

To Answer Your Question, Facebook, No, I Do Not Wish To Use Facebook In “Français (France)”

chuckmore
Oct 26, 2009
My first thought: Why are they blurring out their erections? chuckmore: They should re-name this show ‘Emasculated Closeted Gay Unbelievably Sad Failed Actors of Hell, Who Love Their Kids’. 90% of me wishes I didn’t know it exists. The other 10% hasn’t felt this alive in months.

My first thought: Why are they blurring out their erections?

chuckmore:

They should re-name this show ‘Emasculated Closeted Gay Unbelievably Sad Failed Actors of Hell, Who Love Their Kids’.

90% of me wishes I didn’t know it exists. The other 10% hasn’t felt this alive in months.

Oct 26, 2009

A Headline on ESPN Today: Did Saints Win Last Night’s Game

Of course, the rest was “Or Did Dolphins Lose It?” But still, would’ve been funny if ESPN got so drunk last night they forgot who won.

Oct 26, 2009

Bright Ideas and Grand Thoughts, With Your Internet Host Paul Frank

Oct 25, 2009
"I can’t believe someone is sleeping in later than me. It makes me feel good about myself. Unless he’s dead. Then I’d feel bad about myself."
~ Me, today 1:30 P.M., as our friend slept in the guest room
Oct 22, 2009

Oh God, I've Become One of Them

Oct 14, 2009
"In 10 years, companies won’t have smoking breaks for their employees, they wil have Facebook breaks."
Oct 13, 2009
"Be very leery of any sign that says “FREE CRABS"
Oct 10, 2009

A Funny Idea

Bringing pennies to a strip club; tipping.

Oct 08, 2009

I don’t understand how a tv show can be brought to you by the “rich, creamy taste of Hass avocados.” If it’s wasn’t rich and creamy, would there be no show?

Oct 07, 2009

Now That Grandma Has Life Alert, We Can Push Her Down the Stairs Without a Guilty Conscience

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