DEPRESSED CLOWN

This Is A Comedy Blog Written By Paul Frank.
Updated every day with things I think up.
Check out my column or e-mail me.

Aug 09, 2009
"Michael Phelps should swim in giant pools of bongwater."
Jul 28, 2009

I Just Realized I’d Rather Listen To Insane Clown Posse Than The Ting Tings

Jul 22, 2009

I Love You, God

Jul 16, 2009

I just saw a commercial that said “This CD is the ultimate gift for the power ballad lover in your life.” I don’t have any power ballad lovers in my life. In fact, I’ve put that on my resume before.

Jul 15, 2009

WHAT THE FUCK?

I JUST SAW A “CERTAIN DRI” COMMERCIAL WITH THE CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM MUSIC PLAYING THROUGHOUT..

Jul 15, 2009

You Know You Watch Too Much Porn When…, Volume 3

A couple seconds later in the special, they talk about a porn star/director who went to prison a few months ago, and you know how he is.

They interview another head of a porn company and you know that porn company.

They talk about a really high-budget porn dvd and you recognize it.

They mention another company, and you recognize it.

Then you remember that when you watched True Life: I’m Addicted To Porn, one of the people was a porn star and you knew who she was.

Then you remember that on Tosh.0, one of the guests was a porn star and you knew who she was.

(True Story(s))

Jul 15, 2009

You Know You Watch Too Much Porn When…, Volume 2

You’re watching the special still, and they show another really small clip of a scene from a porn, and you recognize that male and female actor, too.

And then they show two other girls’ names from the beginning credits of the movie and you recognize both those names too.

AND THEN they have an interview with a president of a porn film company, and you recognize that cmopany.

And then mention 5 ‘tube’ sites where people can watch and upload porn videos, included pirated videos, and you’ve been to and recognize all 5.

Jul 15, 2009

You Know You Watch Too Much Porn When…

…You see a special on pornography on CNBC, and they air a 1-second clip of a porn scene and you know the female actor and male actor by name.

(True Story)

Jul 13, 2009

Me: “What’s the difference between Chris Berman and Boomer Esiason?” (seriously) My Roommate: “…They’re two different people…”

Jul 13, 2009
"Mixed martial artists are a different kind of artists than like, Picaso and shit."
Jul 13, 2009
"When a dry hump turns into a wet hump."
Jul 04, 2009
"I have a green car. Not one of those gay environmental shits, like the color green literally."
Jul 02, 2009
"Rape has helped Kobe’s game tremendously. One day, he’s raping a chick blind, 3 years later, he’s in the Olympics and back-to-back finals."
Jun 26, 2009

A Zit Waits Til You're 12

Jun 18, 2009
"This pornography film lacks character development, not to mention a climax. Oh, there it is."

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